Living Lost’s Neighborhood

We were pretty exhausted from the events of the last few weeks and like my knee, our spirits, our minds and hearts were simply battered and bruised.

Friday night the wife and I went out to eat. We hit Logan's Steakhouse and ate copious amounts of steak, ribs and shrimp and even though the place was packed... our table felt secluded in the sea of people and we just talked about everything. The wife obviously had a lot she had wanted to say as I was half done with my food while hers sat there and she was working on her salad.

I had to smile at one point and point at her food and suggest she try some, it was delicious.

She needed to talk however and that was really good.

We then took a stroll through the Avenue, which is the new shopping area in Murfreesboro. She wanted to look at a few things and we eventually ended up at Yankee Candle. We were just going to look, but we found some great smelling candles and I ended up having to go outside and sit on a bench. My knee was at this point absolutely screaming at me.

She was left alone... with my wallet.

Duh Duh Duhhhhhhh

lol it was not bad, she found some great smelling candles and generally while I love oils and incense more, these really made the place smell great.

We walked to Barnes and Noble for a few minutes and while I wanted to stay longer, I was exhausted. Well I should say my knee was, I was starting to drag my leg around at this point... ha ha

Our final stop at the night was a candy run at Wal-Mart. We had plans for Saturday to do something for our kids. We were going to surprise them with a movie, something we generally only do on NetFlix, but a nice Saturday matinee with my brood would be nice.

I really wanted to see Kung Fu Panda, however we were going to let the kids decide.

So Saturday rolls around, we don't tell the kids what we are doing and we arrive at the movie theater... they are jumping around acting nuts.

I tell them what movies are playing... and an almost unanimous response is.... cue Drum Roll...

Kung Fu Panda.

YAY!!!

What a really great movie and my kids were sooooo good in this packed movie theater. Sure it is a kid's movie, but it also is not a playground. But they laughed and cheered with all of the other kids and they ate huge amounts of candy and popcorn.

The troubles and the pain of the last few weeks melted away, if not all the way... then a good portion. The wife enjoyed herself as well.

This was a gift to them... and a good friend of the family helped us do this. So to her, and she knows who she is... thank you. Your gift to us was a help to the kids and the wife and myself. There was sooo many smiles and laughter during this dark time in our life. The words I write simply cannot express the gratitude I feel for what you helped accomplish.

lol epic...

CNN Article: http://www.cnn.com/2008/SHOWBIZ/06/20/campbell.court/index.html

How is it someone can assault people from spitting, language, kicking and hitting... of which is being directed to police officers, house maids, assistants and airline crew time and time and time again and this stuck up waste of human flesh time and time and time again gets away with it?

I would like to know in what ways has Naomi Campbell ever contributed to society in a good way. Well besides providing material for young males to jerk off to over the years.

I love this part of the story, "Chairman of the magistrates' Peter Yiacoumi said he had given Campbell credit for her guilty pleas and previous good character."

Good character? What good character? Someone tell me please... what good character?

I am sure glad people like Martha Stewart were thrown away in the slammer 4 years ago... that bitch deserved it for lying.

Obviously we can all get away with assault.... I am going to go beat the shit out of Potty Mouth now.

CNN Article: http://www.cnn.com/2008/SHOWBIZ/06/20/campbell.court/index.html

How is it someone can assault people from spitting, language, kicking and hitting... of which is being directed to police officers, house maids, assistants and airline crew time and time and time again and this stuck up waste of human flesh time and time and time again gets away with it?

I would like to know in what ways has Naomi Campbell ever contributed to society in a good way. Well besides providing material for young males to jerk off to over the years.

I love this part of the story, "Chairman of the magistrates' Peter Yiacoumi said he had given Campbell credit for her guilty pleas and previous good character."

Good character? What good character? Someone tell me please... what good character?

I am sure glad people like Martha Stewart were thrown away in the slammer 4 years ago... that bitch deserved it for lying.

Obviously we can all get away with assault.... I am going to go beat the shit out of Potty Mouth now.

Our good friend Mitch Horowitz returns in this episode to reveal the amazing life of Colonel Henry Steel Olcott (1832-1907). Our conversation starts with young Olcott’s humble beginnings, early successes in scientific agriculture, and investigations into military contractor corruption during the U.S. Civil War and the assassination of President Abraham Lincoln. It was after this point that Olcott’s life took an even more interesting turn.

Mitch describes how Olcott met Madame Blavatsky. The two helped found the Theosophical Society soon thereafter. Olcott served as the first president of the organization and did a tremendous amount to advance their cause. We talk about their Mahatmas and Olcott’s experiences with the Masters. Mitch describes the fascinating story of young Mohandas Gandhi’s involvement with Theosophy. We also discuss the Herculean work Olcott did to promote Buddhism and Hinduism. It is nothing short of miraculous how a man from such humble beginnings, without a formal education, was able to influence literally billions of people.

So last night after everyone went to bed, I jumped on Elder Scrolls: Oblivion for a while. My new character is a Battle Mage and has joined the assassins guild and is a vampire. Much fun to be had.

I was getting tired and turned it all off and I was going to read some email before bed and literally two minutes before Potty Mouth had sent me a message to tell me that he was on XBox live now.

So we set up some Call of Duty IV and then proceeded, the both of us, to get royally lost. Some serious laughs and good times ensued.

I am glad he is online now, I prefer to game with friends.

Even though it rained and even though it was Friday the 13th, today was a very good day.

The wife and I really were looking forward to having Sean Aaron in our lives. We were having fun with the pregnancy. The plans, the expectations and the hopes crashed on Tuesday morning and all of you whom left comments... your words made it to us and we were comforted by them.

What do you do though? At 16 weeks.. we did not want his body simply discarded and burned as medical waste. The wife is Catholic and I am not, I had no ideas. The wife called her church and it turns out that the Catholics have a place to bury the unborn. In their Garden of Angels we laid our son today.

I would have been happy simply to have had him cremated and give us the ashes, but they handled it... they buried him in a casket and we had a graveside service with the Deacon of her church.

They went out of their way for us and it never costed us a single dime.

The wife and I... we have a sense of closure now and the rains and clouds that covered us on the way there and during the service were literally gone by the time we left. There was sunshine.

It is still painful, the "what ifs", the hopes, the dreams, the plans we had. We will make it... we always do. One foot in front of the other.

The Wife's church really understands the Irish pride I have. When they baptized our children they would always toss in those old Irish prayers I love so much.

Today was no different as her Deacon ended with the old Irish blessing:

My recovery has been very slow going... and quite painful. None of the pain is related to the meniscus tear however, it has all been related to the instruments that were in my leg.

Our lives since yesterday however took a horrific and horrible turn of events however...

It was supposed to be the last day of my recovery, however in the morning my wife went to the restroom and miscarried our baby at 16 weeks. She began screaming and crying in the bathroom when it began.

The bathroom... there was blood everywhere.

I rushed her to the hospital and they started giving her fluids and again... there was blood everywhere.

Her heart rate was way high and I sat next to her and held her hand and just talked to her.

The doctor came in... and in our entire history of doctors, we had one of the most kind and very compassionate ones I have ever seen, someone who handled our nightmare with a gentle voice and with compassion. However, the nurse was one of those people who should seriously think before she opens her mouth.

I got the wife to calm down and we began to talk... we began to wonder what happened.

The last several days she made mention of the fact that the baby did not kick or move.

I did not think anything of it then, but her words are re-playing in my head now.

I then made her smile and laugh a little. Some tension was broken. There were still plenty of tears to come, but for now her heart rate was normal... her blood pressure was normalizing.

Then the time came and they let us go home and while the body of this baby boy was at the hospital, there was the entire bathroom I had to contend with. It looked like a slasher flick was being filmed in my bathroom. There was blood all over the place, from the bathtub, sink, toilet, floor, walls.... it was literally everywhere.

I had cried enough at this point... and this was my wife, so my normally weak stomach was as solid as steel.

With my very painful knee screaming at me... I got down on my hands and knees and began the long laborious process of cleaning up the bathroom.

I almost filled an entire 13 gallon trash bag with old clothes, towels, paper towels... all soaked with blood.

Once I was done, I had to get her comfortable and then I had to go out... back to the hospital... just to get all of the stitches out of my knee.

I later went out and bought alcohol... and a new video game to keep the kids occupied. They have been wanting that Lego Indiana Jones game... and it is easy enough for the 4 year old to play.

Now, while I was writing this... there was yet...ANOTHER turn of events. The wife, while given a clean bill of health is still weak from blood loss. She got up out of the living room chair too fast to get pain medication and come lie down in here. She walked over to me as I was sitting here and then passed right the hell out... she just dropped... and I literally thought she had just died. Her eyes were starring up at the ceiling and there was this strange noise coming from the back of her throat and then... she was really still and silent. I quickly felt for a pulse and kept calling out her name and then suddenly she was back and awake. She thought she was having a nap.

My heart is just now calming down... she is awake and fine. She just got up too fast... I am pumping her with liquids and keeping an eye on her. I was going to take her to the hospital, but she is serious in that she just got up too fast and she feels great right now.

The hospital said her blood count was fine, she has had one more occasion of blood loss... no where near what she had yesterday. Her body is just getting back to normal is all that it is...

I just told her that she needs to stay the hell in bed unless she has to get up to use the restroom.

So we are now in the present... right here.

So I am going to leave a song for the wife here... I have a playlist called "Songs that Make Life Worth Living". Made up of what I consider the best songs ever written...